Red Light

Those mornings I wake with heaviness in my spirit, are far worse than any heaviness found in my body's affliction.  Today, as the bright morning sun filters in through the windows, I sense a sorrow deep within me that must be acknowledged.  Although vibrant colors surround me at every angle, I feel only the absence of light.  These are the toughest days for anyone in the midst of troubling times; and I take a moment to unite myself with all those suffering. I am not alone as I lift my prayer to God for strength and healing.

Today must be lived with a little darkness – and curse the darkness I do!  I am irritable, unbearable, moody and downright pissed off.  I yearn for the ability to get up and go, for the independence stolen from me.  Over and over lamenting about how hard every task is to complete and how tired I am.  Save me from myself!

Today, a Red Traffic Light will be my saving grace.

As I head down Jericho Turnpike, driving locally to run an errand, I approach a Red Light.  Waiting with little patience, I count the minutes for it to change to green.  “Does it always take so long at this intersection?”  “Maybe the light is broken?”  I contemplate going through just as the green light appears, giving me the go ahead. 

Off I go, but not very far.  As I approach the next intersection I face another Red Light.  “This is strange,” I think as I make my way to a stop.  The lights seem out of sync.  I tap my hands on the steering wheel, willing the light to change.  Nothing…. puzzled and confused, I look around to see the people travelling in cars next to me.  They all appear surprised.  Some venture through the Red – unwilling to wait it out.  Horns begin to blast and cars swerve to get past the seemingly broken Red Light.  I remain calm and unaffected by the madness around me.  Could a busted traffic light have the power to ruin someone's day?  After what seems like five minutes, green shines allowing us to move forward.

Continuing my journey down Jericho Turnpike, the approaching Traffic Light is changing to yellow.  I cannot believe in less then a short mile – I would be facing another Red Light.  Just what the heck is going on?  As I approach this stop I look directly into the brightly shining red signal and begin to laugh out loud. 

To witness the effect of this minor inconvenience on the people in cars nearby – gave me a  moment of clarity to break free from my mood.  Do these strangers have some place so important to be or pressing business demanding their attention?  Why the hurry, why the attitude, why the rage?  Isn’t it the journey that makes the destination ever so sweet?  And what journey doesn’t come with detours and road blocks?

The Red Lights made me aware that life moves at a fast pace and sometimes it’s OK to be a little "out of sync".  Stopping is oftentimes necessary to live a complete and fulfilled life.  Almost like the strength to “get up after you fall” – these Red Lights gave purpose to help me “move forward after being forced to slow down”.  

I lose track of time not noticing when the Red vanished, replaced by the Green signal to go.  I remain with my foot on the brake, staring out the window, taking in the sunshine -  all the while listening to the crazy person behind me - frantically beeping his horn to get me to move forward.