"without ceasing"

Watching the sea of people packed into Time Square – cheering & counting down the arrival of 2020 – makes my comfy couch seem even more comfortable.  Ushering in a New Year with the added twist of beginning “the roaring 20’s” decade has me feeling rather nostalgic. Maybe it is my middle-age view, but the dawning of future days cannot be imagined without reflection on some wisdom I’ve picked up along the way.  

The 10-year snapshots of days passed are almost surreal.   It’s like looking at the pages of a glossy magazine portraying “the best & worst” of times.  Each frame of my memories now has this chronic, unwelcome, fateful, fearful MsMonster lurking about.  The full smile across my face cannot mask the dreaded presence of fatigue.  My body language, either sitting or standing, highlights my battle to remain strong.  And a closer look into my bright eyes does little to offset the weariness behind them.

My MS diagnosis… undeniably present this last decade…  has also been my greatest teacher.  Being in the classroom of loss - has slowly taught me to appreciate the things that make a full life.  And like an old Polaroid photograph from years ago - time is needed to develop that  kind of understanding.

Today, in our digital world (where photographs are taken & shared freely) life seems to be always on display.  But the truth of each moment captured lies not in what is observable.   The imperfections within us reveal what it means to be fully alive.  And we are called to honor the gift of life from our glorious creator no matter how imperfect.  

Armed with this wisdom comes a new mindset on the adventures before me. It is “without ceasing” that I choose to live & be seen in the coming days.

         “without ceasing”  I will look to the heavens to guide my every step.

         “without ceasing”  my hands will fold and my lips will utter a prayer.

         “without ceasing”  I will never forget the hearts who shape me.

         “without ceasing”  the light inside of me will shine onto others.

         “without ceasing”  I will seek out people who challenge me to grow.         

         “without ceasing”  trust will reign in my heart

         “without ceasing”  I will move and push and never give up.

         “without ceasing”  I will receive the blessing of each outstretched hand

                                         offering help as they walk this journey with me.

Happy & Healthy New Year!!

May your days be ceaseless in Wonder and Awe!